Paragraph Revision

original content.

What is the definition of an 'angel'? Well there are many definitions for it. According to Merriam-Webster dictionary, it is a spiritual being superior to humans is power and intelligence, an attendant spirit or guardian, white robed winged figure of human form in fine art, and many more. However, in 'The Very Old Man with Enormous Wings', the old man was an angel because a doctor determined that his wings were natural to his body, and also only good things happened after his arrival in Pelayo and Elisenda's courtyard. Also an old man didn't age but get younger and not only the Pelayo's family but all the people around them met an old man. He also got chick pox as he got younger and at last he disappeared. So, rather thinking that an old man is an imaginary character, he is an actual angel.

revised.

Angel in the novel 'The Very Old Man with Enormous Wings’ must be recognize as angel without no doubts. Also there can’t be assumption or points that angel must be illusion or hallucination because Pelayo’s family are not only people who saw an angel. He, an angle, had wings which determined by doctor that he born with. Usually human beings don’t have wings. Also he revived from the death, and clearly human beings can’t revive from the death. Lastly, he must be angel rather than something else because ever since he came, only the good events happened to Pelayo’s family.

I revised few major things.
First, I took out many Unnecessary words and sentences. I also took out the definition/dictionary parts. I fixed tone of the passage because last one was too casual. And I made my paragraph more concise and clear in both content and grammar.

Thesis statement

‘A Very Old Man with Enormous Wings’

A very old man with enormous wings was an angel because of these several reasons. Not only the family but also doctor who took care of him saw and examine the angel. After the angel came, only the good event happened, or at least, none of the bad event happened. Lastly, usually angels are the kids flying around God; fully grown angel is common misconception of the people.

picture doesn't really working.

http://photos-h.ak.facebook.com/photos-ak-snc1/v346/222/80/3231113/n3231113_40276207_9668.jpg

this is link. But still not really clear.
I will find the way to do it.

Miss Emily's facebook

Please download the picture and view. it doesn't fit here.
This time, I made a simple outline of how Miss Emily's facebook would look like.
I think Miss Emily will have privacy setting on her facebook page. So that only friends(facebook) could surf on her webpage. Also, I don’t think she would have lots of friends in facebook because also in the story, she really didn’t have any friends other than relatives.
In photos, I don’t think Miss Emily would post many pictures of her. And because of her characteristics that hold on to the past, I think she might have pictures with her dad or Homer. And I don’t think she would have any applications in her facebook page.

I putted pictures of Miss Emily with her dad as the main picture because of she is always holding on to her past. So even if her father died, and gone, I think Miss Emily will post picture of her and her father like as if her father is alive. Also, I am leaving message as a black man because all the other people(not friends in facebook, like Brian Lee) would not able to see her facebook page because of privacy setting. And she might have left the relationship status with Homer Barron up even though she killed Homer. Like as he is alive, like past. And I think she might be socializing with little kids who were taking Emily’s China drawing lessons. So I made her left comment on one of her student’s picture of China drawing. And I left one comment of the druggist because in the story, it seems like druggist was worrying about arsenic a lot.

picture worth thousand words

When I read about ‘We Real Cool’ poem, it keeps remind me of a James Dean. I think this poem really suites well with James Dean’s image and life it selves. I am pretty sure that most people if ever played pool in MU, they recognize this picture, James Dean playing pool with Humphery Bogart and Marilyn Monroe watching them playing. Like in the poem, James dean was a pool player. And the entire image is really matching with James Dean. In the poem, characters in the poem really don’t have reasons to be real cool. So does James Dean in ‘Rebel Without a Cause’.
Like in the poem, James Dean was cool, real cool. And he died soon (1931~1955), like in the poem.

Parody

We real cool

THE POOL PLAYERS.
SEVEN AT THE GOLDEN SHOVEL.

We real cool. We
Left school. We

Lurk late. We
Strike straight. We

Sing sin. We
Thin gin. We

Jazz June. We
Die soon



I real cool

The Book reader
Seven at the school library

I real cool. I
Go school. I

Love privacy. I
Crave supremacy. I

Sit front row A. I
Get all straight A. I

Don’t like party. I
Don’t have time. I

Listen classic. I
Ignore gossip. I

Take Pills for perfect fast brain. I
Make needles for pale blue vain. I

Study alone. I
Die alone.

we real cool

I think this poem could be analyzed in two ways. Either don’t be cool, or be cool.
And this is depend on how individual understand (take) on the last line of the poem.
Let’s see line by line.

The Pool Players: yes they are cool. It is common concept that pool players are tough, cool, and guys.
Seven at the golden shovel: seven people who are real cool. This means group of cool people.
We real cool. We: poem starts out the fact that they are real cool. Not just cool.
Left school.
Lurk late. We
Strike Straight. We
Sing sin. We
Thin gin. We
Jazz June. We: these are the entire real cool things that they have done together.
Die soon : this last line maybe trying to tell readers multiple things.
One thins is that don’t be cool because you will sin, live like trash, and die soon.
Or in other hand, they(we) are so cool that they take death like nothing and they die when they are still cool so that they will be always remembered as real cool people.
However, this poem reminded me of James Dean and Kurt Cobain. And, I don’t want to be real cool. I will live long, and be just cool.